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Sundress and basketball shorts weather is upon us, meaning summer is almost here and us queers will be ready to do our best thottery in the sun and warmth. This season will be an especially important one, because 1) the COVID landscape has changed due to vaccines being available everywhere, and 2) many of us have been as single as a Kraft cheese slice, in a holding pattern for over a year, desperate to feel the weight of a womxn on us but unable to pursue it safely because *COVID*.
Now I know we all lowkey want to bust it wide open like everyone on P-Valley and do the most, but we still have to be smart and safe out here. Because I care about my fellow black queers, I’m leaving you with some sex tips to ensure you have a worthwhile #hotqueersummer, not a #hotqueermess.
Get tested: Even though COVID testing became a much higher priority than STD testing in the last year, it’s still imperative that we and our sex partners are tested with clean results (or treated if not). We have to make sure our parts are in working order, so we don’t harm ourselves or spread contagion to the next chick we swipe right on Bumble. Most free clinics, urgent care facilities, wellness centers, and your PCP will do STD testing for you. Do right by your box and keep up with her health! Don’t let someone else determine its condition for you. It might delay that instant gratification you want by 5 to 7 business days, but it’s worth it for safety.
Protection so there’s no infection: Don’t believe the myth—womxn can pass STDs and STIs between one another. Protect your poon! Use condoms for that strap, gloves for fingering, and a dental dam for oral sex. These things are free at your local clinic and doctor’s office, and Amazon has them for purchase. If you are living with a manageable STD/STI, you have a right to enjoy sex too! Just make sure you’re using these same protections regularly, keeping up with the appropriate medications and doctor’s visits, and communicating with your partners. Great safe sex is more than possible with protection, and we as a community have to be better about implementing this into our routines.
Leave the old roster alone: I’m sure we’d all love to get our brains Men In Black memory wiped of the last year we spent in quarantine, scratching at the walls and praying over the next brunch. But since we can’t, the least we can do is start our #hotqueersummer off with a clean slate, particularly who we decided to sleep with. It doesn’t matter if that crazy fem had the best pussy on the planet. Who cares if that stud that stole your identity made you cum every single time? It isn’t worth the drama. Good pussy and stellar strap don’t have to have crazy attached. After a year of our sanity being tested, we need some peace. Offer yourself some in the form of someone who’s not only safe and COVID-free, but also moisturizes and has seen a successful round of therapy.
Remember to keep it casual: A #hotqueersummer implies that you’re looking to have fun without attachment. That’s awesome, but just make sure to stand firm on that even when the pesky urge to nest takes over in the midst of first lust. Not knowing what you want can cause emotional complications for you and your sex partner(s), so make it clear that you’re keeping things casual and not seeking a commitment of any sort. Situationships don’t do well during a #hotqueersummer.
Keep these tips handy when your thotdom commences, and you’ll have a safe, fun, drama-free summer that you can look back on with the chick you U-Haul with later and laugh. It’s everyone’s responsibility to keep up with their sexual and emotional health and make choices that support our community as a whole doing this. There’s nothing better than safe, consensual, mutually satisfying sex with a beautiful melanated queer womxn. All we’re doing is making sure you have the base-level steps down. Good luck . . . and stretch first.
Written By: Eden Carswell (@locs_on_the_rocks, IG)